I attended a Celebration of Life, (funeral service), of a childhood friend. He passed away of a senseless act of violence which took him away from his 10 children. He was a family man and a man connected to his community. His presence will be missed. Rest on Keith Jackson. 

Growing up, my father ( Deddy, as I will refer to him throughout the remainder of this article), meant the world to me. My sisters and I were all daddies’ girls and there was nothing that my deddy would not do for me or any of my sisters. When I would forget my lunch money for school, I would make a simple phone call and my deddy would bring it up to my school. I would get a call from the office and I knew my deddy had once again saved the day. During the rainy season, I would hand him the keys to his truck and he knew he had to take me, Teresa and Ronda to school with no questions asked. 

My deddy would take our family, and kids from the block, up to Clearlake and Lake Berryessa, where we would swim and live off the land for the entire weekend. As soon as fish were caught, my mommy would clean them and into the cast iron skillet they would go. 

Father’s have a huge impact on their children’s lives. Boys will model themselves after their fathers. The will look for their father’s approval in everything they do, and copy those behaviors that they recognize as both successful and familiar. The father-son bond is an important first step in a child’s social growth, it can influence their friendships, their work ethics, their romantic involvements and so many more aspects of a boy’s life. Having a present and involved father allows a boy to be involved in social, academic, scouting and athletic activities. This involvement keeps a boy busy and well-rounded, which in turn helps the boy stay out of trouble. Additionally, the emotional benefits from a present father are innumerable to a young boy, and directly impact their emotional and behavioral stability throughout their lives. 

It’s said that girls marry men that have similar characteristics like their father’s. Girls will look for men who hold those same patterns as their father’s. The father-daughter bond is one of the most important emotional bonds a girl will make. Girl, like boys, will cycle back and forth between loving mom and pushing away dad, then loving dad and pushing mom away. Without a present father, she will be left pushing away from her mother with no one to attach to during that time. This bond also sets the daughters ideal for future partners, in play, school and eventually in Love. Girls, more than boys, develop their sense of self-worth and self-esteem based in a large part on the attention and love they perceive from their father’s. With a present attentive father, girls tend to have better self-esteem and therefore stronger emotional health in all aspects of the development.

A Father’s presence is also felt within the community. Every father figure on our block had the RESPECT of every child and adolescent who ran those streets. We knew not to talk smart, talk back or cuss in the presence of grown folks or you would definitely get a whooping.

I would like to thank all Father’s, Dads, Papas, who are actively teaching their children important life skills. This, after all, is what makes life worth living.
Thanks Deddy